Tag: Blogging

Smut Marathon Round 2: The Results

end-1733893_640The results are in for Round 2 of the Smut Marathon, and the feedback is now available on the blog post containing our entries. I have not made it through to Round 3. While I am obviously disappointed, my feeling are overwhelmingly positive. Before I go on I will start with the entry I submitted. The original metaphor I used from the first round is in Italics.

The Disciple

The hot water cascades over his body, cleansing him as his ritual begins. Once dry he adorns himself with his symbols of submission. Reciting his mantra with every buckle he fastens. ‘I am bound to only you, I serve you with reverence and devotion.’ He is like the High Priest, called to worship at the temple of her body. I am their disciple. I bear witness to their passion, as I am baptised by the glory of their love.

When all the entries were released I knew as soon as I read them that I wouldn’t make it through to Round 3. From the way the judging went in Round 1, I had a feeling that there were others there that would draw people in more. Not because I don’t think my entry was good though. I am proud of what I wrote and to be honest I really love what I came up with.

When I first read through the feedback my initial reaction was ‘well clearly I know nothing about writing’, and believe it or not that was not solely based on the feedback for my own piece, but on many of the other entries too. People who are in a place to offer useful criticisms to those of us in this contest, not only didn’t respond overly well to what I had written, but also did not favour the pieces I especially liked and pieces that I thought had glaring flaws or just to my mind weren’t as good as others were given higher praise than I would have guessed.

The feedback I received was a mixed bag.

  • Halfway you change perspectives from ‘he’ to ‘I’. I am missing a story here.
  • Words have depicted great anticipation and ritualistic preparation for the sexy scenario which is likely to follow, but I feel this prologue itself isn’t erotic.
  • This one was missing something, I thought. It’s good and it’s well-written, and it seems to extend the metaphor versus tell its own tale using it, both of which are good ways of doing similar things. I think it was because this one was almost too short, too succinct. That said, I liked it!
  • This is beautiful and intense. At first I thought that you should have used more words, as you had quite some to spare, but this just works so well that I see why you have left it this short. More words might have taken away the strength of the ones you have used.

I think all the feedback is fair and accurate, except the first piece. I think the context of the words and the title of the piece should lead most people to understand why there is a change in perspectives. The Disciple, the ‘I’ is telling the story, he bearing witness so is he watching the ‘he’. Perhaps a line break before the last sentence would have made that clearer. Had the feedback been, ‘I had to read this a couple of times before I understood the change in perspective’ then my feathers would be a little less ruffled. That said I disagreed with all of the feedback that particular judge left for all the pieces, so clearly we do not view things in the same way.


I wrote the above paragraphs on the day the Round 2 results came out and have been pondering the past few days whether I should start this blog post over. I’m worried I sound bitter at my leaving the contest and as that really isn’t the case. The reason I’ve chosen to leave it is because I think it’s valid.

The judges are entirely within their rights to judge on whatever aspects of writing they choose too. However some feedback was far more helpful than others in assisting the writers to not only act upon the feedback but also accept it as useful critique as opposed to lowering their morale.

I feel hugely positive about the experience I had in the first two rounds of the Smut Marathon. In only two rounds I discovered ways to improve my writing and also new ways to approach my writing overall. I identified where my strengths lay and to be honest, what I do well is what I have always wanted to do with my writing; convey feeling and create emotion.

Is it important to me that my punctuation and grammar is good? Of course it is, and I will continue to improve my knowledge and execution of the technical side of my pieces. However, I suspect that isn’t why people read what I write. You don’t come here for the perfect use of commas, or the the well chosen placement of a semi-colon. With any luck you’re here because you enjoy what I have to say, either because it resonates with you or offers some glimmer of advice. Perhaps you only come for the erotica because it turns you on and makes you want to touch yourself. On every level I am okay with all those reasons for you being here.

Many of my favourite entrants of the Smut Marathon have left alongside me. I am as sad to see their journey come to end as. However I will be swinging by their blogs to see what wonderful works they come up with and you should too.

Of course 40 brilliant writers still remain and I am so excited to see what the future rounds bring. I have no doubt that we will see some wonderful assignments be presented to them and they will rise to the challenges set with gloriously delicious smut.

I will be voting and blogging about future rounds of the Smut Marathon and I urge you all to place your votes too. I appreciate it is a lot to read, but too many people said they were sad to see their favourites leave but hadn’t actually voted for them. I appreciate we all lead busy lives but those votes might have made the difference to your favourite staying or going.

The most unexpected but also the most enjoyable thing to come out of my entering thesoft-toys-3158361_640 Smut Marathon is new friends. I have discovered so many new bloggers and Twitter friends and that has made every moment of entering worthwhile.

Life and time permitting I fully intend to enter the Smut Marathon next year and I hope that entrants who have both left the contest already and those that still remain will be back too.

As I mentioned in a previous blog post I actually wrote three potential pieces of micro-fiction for the second round and I will now share the other two pieces with you.

Absent Lover

When he came home to her, she would lose herself in him as his presence engulfed her and their bodies entwined. She examined and filed away every sight, sound, touch, taste and scent; her mind becoming an ever-expanding catalogue of sensual experiences to be re-experienced at will. She loved to delve into those memories when he was out of reach. When she ached for him and longed to feel his touch. Her hands moving deftly across her soft flesh, as desire flushed upon her skin and her wet, aching cunt called her fingers to action. Her fingers would beckon him, memories and orgasm growing stronger together. Until mind and body exploded in tandem satiating for the briefest of moments her long for him.

The Witness

His cock twitched and ached at the sight before him. The three lovers twisted into a knot of flesh, bearing no identifiable shape to the witness in the chair. He longed to be amongst them, to feel their soft, supple bodies against his own. Mouths lapped at nipples and cunts, causing a melody of pleasure at odds with the involuntary grunts that escaped his gagged mouth. Limbs bound to the sturdy chair beneath him, his only protest at his lack of attention was to strain with futility against his bindings. His body betrayed his enjoyment though. Cock erect, tip glistening with excitement. They had him right where they wanted him, and he was exactly where he loved to be.

Good luck to all the remaining entrants, I will be cheering you all on and sending positive vibes your way throughout.

#SoSS – Is Your Sunday Sinful?

I wasn’t going to do a #SoSS post this week. With one thing and another I just haven’t had the time to sit and read as many blog posts as I would have liked to. I did however stumble across a tweet from @Mollysdailykiss, which inspired me to take action.

If you haven’t heard of #sinfulsunday, then now is your chance. Hosted by Molly from Mollysdailykiss, it a chance for people to showcase their sexy and erotic pictures. With the shadowban being placed on more and more of our wonderful community sharing these kinds of memes is becoming even more important.

Join in the #sinfulsunday fun

I’ve had a browse through this weeks images and would like to share a few of them with you. The collection is not closed yet though, so you still have time to get involved and add your link into the mix. I won’t be sharing the images in this blog post, as I would hate to share an image without permission, but you should definitely click on the links provided to see them.

The first image that caught my eye from was Daylia Catt, from a post titled ‘Sinful Sunday. Master whipped by back for some fun.’ As both a Sadist and a masochist her image made me squirm with delight. It is seriously delicious. Granted it won’t be to everyone’s tastes, but oh my goodness it was definitely to mine.

We don’t have to be baring all to be sexy, a point proven in a wonderful manner by Posy churchgate in her image ‘Man! I feel like a woman!’ The combination of crisp white shirt, sexy black shorts, fishnet clad legs, and kickass boots made for a really gorgeous image.

That’s not to say I’m not a fan of more flesh being on show though. There is definitely some skin to delight you in kinkyandperky’s image from his post ‘Feeling my collar’. Not only do we get a lovely image, but also a little insight into kinkyandperky’s thoughts on his new collar. I love these insights into other peoples dynamics. I am so grateful that people take the time to share.

As regular readers will know I don’t always say nice things about dick pics. Usually because they come unsolicited into my inbox. I have always said though I am not opposed to well crafted picture of a cock. In Malflic’s image ‘Shades of a Circle Jerk’ we get just that. If you are in possession of a cock and feel like you can take an an erotic shot, then I think we definitely need more sensual and seductive cock shots in the world.

One day I might find my way to get involved in Sinful Sunday myself, but in the meantime I shall just support all the other lovelies that are taking part. If you do decide to take part yourself then I can’t wait to see your images, I know for sure I have some readers who could take delightful pictures to share with us all.

I will leave with an image of my own, that I haven’t submitted for Sinful Sunday, but is definitely a good example of how I like to spend my time. The gorgeous man bod in my ropes is of course Bakji.





Smut Marathon: Round 2 Voting Is Now Open

In Round 1 of the Smut Marathon we each wrote our own metaphor. In Round 2 we were challenged to take one of those metaphors and turn it into a piece of micro-fiction. The voting has now opened for the 62 micro-fiction pieces that were submitted. Please do give them all a read and place your votes. Only 40 of us will make it through to Round 3, so getting the votes from as many people as possible is so important to all the writers.

I was so eager on Sunday evening to read through all the entries and place my own votes. At the time of writing this it is Wednesday and I have only just done it. Partly because I had a little bit of post-kink recovery going on, but also because it was so hard to choose my favourite three. I managed to get down to my six favourites, but from there it was tricky to favour only half of them.

I had three possible pieces to submit for this round and I have this niggling feeling that I have made the wrong decision on the one I finally chose. I still love it, and I worked hard on making it the best I felt it could be. I think one or even both of my other options might have told a more unique story, that would perhaps have drawn in more votes.

The feedback I received in the last round was helpful once I’d digested it, but I must admit it wasn’t what I was expecting to hear. This time round I think I have a fair idea of the feedback I might get. If I’m right, and this piece doesn’t get me through to the third round, I still think this is a valuable lesson. Yes, I needed to see my entry alongside others to see where I might have gone wrong, but maybe in the future I will hone that skill so I can make alterations ahead of time.

One of the things I touched upon in ‘Smut Marathon: Round 2 Is Upon Us’ was leaving more feedback. Turns out that is easier said than done. I’ve got feedback for my top six, but would ideally like to contribute a little more, as I know many entrants were frustrated by the lack of feedback they got. With that in mind I’m going to try and focus on; Did you make me feel something? If so, why? And if not, why not? I don’t feel remotely qualified to comment on the technical aspects of writing, so it seems unfair to do so.

My entry from the first round has been used twice for this round. Which in itself is an absolute delight. Going into this round I did harbour a hope that at least one person would be inspired to use my piece for their round 2 entry. I can’t share which metaphor I used, as it would narrow down which piece is mine, I do hope that the person who wrote it originally enjoys what I have done with it though.

Whatever happens with the voting of this round I wish all the writers taking part the very best of luck, and I hope that those who don’t make it through to Round 3 will return next year to give it another shot. I know I will definitely be back, no matter what the outcome of this year’s competition is.

Many of the other entrants are sharing their thoughts on the ongoing progress of the Smut Marathon too, so why not swing by their blogs and give their posts a read.

#SoSS – Therapy, Fucking and … More Fucking!

IMG_6992Monday brought me my first, ‘well that’s a #SoSS post’ moment when I read The Therapist by Karin at theswingshift. This week saw me starting to share some of my experiences with mental health, part of which details how I never quite succeeded in sticking with therapy. That isn’t because I don’t value it though, I absolutely do, especially when as Kinksters we find an understanding and supportive therapist. I don’t know Karin personally, only through the post I’ve read on her blog, that didn’t stop me thoroughly touched though at her thoughts on finding and visiting a therapist.

I’ve had an interesting week. I’ve been delving into the parts of my brain I don’t tend to visit very often and when I read Sometimes I need the Rough Stuff by Sassy Cat, I absolutely got it. Unfortunately weather and other commitments meant Bakji and I didn’t get any sexy times this week, but oooh boy was this a week for needing the rough stuff. For me it’s more about feeling something ‘bigger’ and ‘deeper’ than what I’m feeling in my head. Rough sex or kink that hurts so good, or words that sound harsh to the unknowing ear but sooth my brain niggles like a lullaby. I love that stuff, but as Cat says in her post, ‘only when I know they don’t truly mean what they say in the heat of the moment’.

Escape on the High Seas by Livvy Libertine is a following on piece from her previousIMG_6997 post A Valuable Treasure. I won’t lie I didn’t read them in order though, I normally would have but I got so caught up in the story I just couldn’t stop. I feel like I’ve read part of a book and don’t have the rest of the pages to quench my thirst for the rest of the tale. I am hoping that Livvy gives us more of this tale, because I really want to know more.

As I said I’ve been feeling the urge for the rougher side of sex and kink this week. For me that also includes dirty words and forthright descriptions of sexual activities. Such a Dirty Bitch Deserves a Whipping by May More delivered on both counts. I got to the end and all I could think was 1) that dress does look delightful, 2) I’m a dirty bitch and 3) Goddammit where’s my whipping!

My last offering for this weeks #SoSS is That Time in the Car Park by PixieHeart. It is an all over sexy tale, and it definitely got me hot under the collar and feeling frisky. However, there was one sentence alone that made it worthy of being included in this roundup.

He takes hold of my hand and for a minute I thought I was safe, that my punishment was over

Now I don’t know PixieHeart’s Husband a.k.a The Boss Man. However, the Sadistic Dominant in me laughed hard when I read this. That sexy evil laughter though, that tends to get masochists and submissives giddy with that nervous sexual energy. ‘For a IMG_6998minute I thought I was safe’, what a delightful way to make someone feel, right before you prove them wrong. Loved this Pixie. Absolutely loved it.

That is your lot from me this week. I hope you give all these posts a read and more that will be shared through #SoSS over on Twitter. I have seen plenty of sex bloggers commenting on how they have been shadow-banned this week, so this is definitely something we need to keep ploughing away at so that all these wonderful posts don’t go unnoticed.

Smut Marathon: Round 2 Is Upon Us

As the voting ended for the first round of Smut Marathon and the results were revealed, I don’t think I was alone in having the following thoughts: 1. How have I done?, 2. What feedback will I get? And 3. What is the next assignment going to be? You can read my thoughts on points one and two in Smut Marathon Round 1: The Votes Are In. This post will cover my thoughts so far on point three and the assignment we have now received.

Once again as per the rules I can’t share with you what the assignment is. I can tell you though that when I open the email containing our instructions I was genuinely excited. I think it is a great assignment. It is one that my brain feels ready to attack due to some previous writing tasks I have engaged in. If the last round taught me anything though it’s that being prepared and feeling proud of your entry doesn’t actually mean you will do well. I’m also pleased with the creativity it allows for. While still challenging us to hone skills that we may not have perfected, or even to gain skills we don’t yet have.

IMG_6834.JPGOne of the things I am doing differently in this round is having more options to choose from. With the last entry I came up with two ideas, but couldn’t shake the idea that my initial metaphor was the one to go for. Hindsight as they say is a wonderful thing, and I wish I’d plunged into the depths of my mind for some more ideas, and been less precious about the metaphor I loved most because it made me feel something.

My second idea from the first round is below for those people who might like to see what else I came up with for the last assignment. Which I now know would probably have garnered the same feedback. I really do love a comma! I didn’t really give it the attention it needed though to come to anything more substantial. Which means that in this round more ideas will be jotted down and given a chance to be developed into something wonderful.

Kiss, click, I come undone, my body unfurls, with need, in peace, submission granted, I am home, at your feet, your passion released me, you are my love, my key.

In terms of the feedback I received and the feedback I took on from other peoples pieces, there are a few things I will be working on this time round. Punctuation, watch out commas I’m coming for you. Sentence structure and structure of the piece overall. I’m also going to be more aware of including useless words and be cautious with trying to over explain things. I think I need to be a little more subtle sometimes and let my readers draw up their own imagery, instead of directing how I’d like them to see the piece.

I know some people have been left questioning themselves and their decision to enter the Smut Marathon since the results and feedback from round 1 were revealed. I hope that every one of the 75 entrants who submitted to the first round do so for the second round too. Each round is so different from the other, and I suspect from future rounds too, that you just never know what you might learn or how you might grow by giving it a try.

I understand being wary of receiving the feedback and having your confidence shaken. IMG_6833Especially if you mainly write to share your personal experiences, it can be hard to suddenly be hit with critiques of how your writing isn’t quite on point. Many of us suffer with imposter syndrome from time to time and I think Smut Marathon may trigger that in many people. Remember you are not alone though. We are all sat at our computers, or on our phones during a commute, wondering what on earth we are going to write. Even those of us who have come up with something, are going to be wondering if what we’ve written is good enough to submit.

Our deadline for this assignment is March 3rd and voting for the second round opens March 4th. I hope we will have even more people reading and voting in this round, and I get a feeling that we will all be doing our best to leave more feedback than we did in the previous round.

#SoSS – Shared Joy is Double Joy

I follow lots of blogs, but I have never managed to keep track of any of that, for that I apologise, especially if I’m missing out on wonderful posts. It’s part of the reason I enjoy social media, because I get pointed in the direction of good things by those I follow. Another way I enjoy finding good reads is writing memes like Masturbation Monday, Wicked Wednesday and Kink of the Week.

Masturbation-Monday-badge-1Masturbation Monday led me to two of the things I’d like to share with you this week. The first being Teachers Pet by Hey Mrs. Robinson. When I started reading it my initial reaction was ‘ooh this is naughty, naughty’. I merrily read along, absolutely thinking I had this story banged to rights. Then I got to the end and realised I absolutely didn’t, and that made me enjoy it even more.

The second piece of Masturbation Monday fiction I enjoyed was The Shoemaker by Cousin Pons. This appealed to me for two reasons. One, it was super sexy and two, it involved feet. I never imagined I’d be someone who was into anything to do with feet. Here I am though, someone who enjoys foot worship and the giving of sexual pleasures by way of my feet. When I read The Shoemaker, I could imagine all the things that were described and they absolutely ticked all the boxes for me.

Now is the time for me to mention my current obsession, the Smut Marathon. We now have a page were we can link our posts we write with reference to the Smut Marathon, and this week that includes Smut Marathon Round 1: On Comfort Zones and Other Stories. Joining the Smut Marathon myself was a huge leap out of my own comfort zone, so I related to an a lot of what was said in this piece. I think sharing our experience of the Smut Marathon is great way to encourage people to perhaps consider participating next year, even if it doesn’t feel like the comfortable thing for you to do.

A long time favourite blog of mine is Poly.Land, which regular readers and podcast listeners will know. This week I read ‘There’s Something Magical About That Person Who Raises Your Standards’ and my brain was giving all the thumbs up as I read it. When I my Bakji my standards weren’t great, in many aspects of life, a low opinion of myself had allowed me to lower them to unforgivable levels. This isn’t the white knight story though, I wasn’t a damsel in distress and I didn’t need saving. What I need was a healthy dose of reality and a better vision of myself both of which Bakji helped me to find. I think the quote below from Page’s article sums it up perfectly.

‘There’s something magical about that person who not only meets your needs but also raises your standards. Who turns you into a bit of a love snob. Who can throw away the storybook notions you had of romance at nine years old and replace them with something that’s somehow both more realistic and better.’ -Page Turner, Poly.Land

My last post for this week is Fantasies of Being Gangbanged by Isabelle Lauren. I wanted to share this one because I spend a lot of my time, both as a blogger and a podcaster encouraging people to turn their kinky desires and fantasies into reality. I enjoyed this blog post for presenting the joy of indulging in fantasies that you know will never be reality, nor would you wish for them to be. I have some of those myself, some of them are impossible to achieve, the video below highlights this with the themes of vampires, fear and being buried in the dirt! Others involve a level of brutality and danger that I just couldn’t risk. It doesn’t mean the idea of them isn’t arousing though, and very much enjoy my alone time with nothing but my imagination and my vibrator for company. 

You find more #SoSS posts by checking out the hashtag on Twitter. It is a great way for us to support and share the writings that many social media platforms see fit to silence. Which is reason enough to get involved by liking, sharing and shouting about the posts you love.

Is Confidence Affecting Your Kink?

If you are human, and I’m assuming most of my readers are, there is a chance that at some point in life you’ve had a crisis of confidence. More times than I can count I have heard someone use low confidence levels as to why they are too nervous to try a new kink with a partner. This is especially so when is comes to taking control and being the Dominant partner, though that is not to say that is the only scenario that lack of confidence infiltrates.

I have without doubt struggled with this issue myself, aided wonderfully by other people being less than encouraging about attempts I did make to try new things. When I met Bakji things started to shift, due to his constant support, encouragement and kindness and I decided that new things were definitely something I wanted to do.

As many of you will know I have a huge love of FemDom, it is hard for me to believe now, but at one point trying to Top Bakji was an absolutely no. My reason for telling him I wasn’t into it? Confidence. I was scared of getting it wrong, of looking daft or that he just wouldn’t enjoy it. Some of the things I started to notice really helped boost my confidence and I am hoping that by sharing them with you, my lovely readers, some of you might be brave and try something new.

Your Partner Wants Your Attention

IMG_6839.JPGThis is true of any relationship I’m sure. When is comes to BDSM scenes though it is my thinking that this desire is often amplified. When I started Topping Bakji I noticed how well he responded to being the focus of my attention. Yes the specific actions helped make our scenes more arousing, but at the heart of it, being into him was what was fuelling the fire. I know from being the bottom that I find this statement true for myself. More often than not, it’s isn’t always what Bakji is doing that I love most, it’s that it is him doing it.

Your Partner Loves Your Body

Our image of our own body is rarely the image other people have of it. It is rare to encounter a person who doesn’t have, or hasn’t at some point had an issue with their body in some way, shape or form. What that looks like varied dramatically from person to person. What often doesn’t change though is the fact that the person in question has a body that is adored by their partner. I know it can be hard to put aside our own insecurities, especially when feeling exposed, which kink can do both physically and emotionally. There is a good chance though that your partner isn’t looking at your double chin, small boobs or extra tummy, they’re just loving being intimate with you in that moment.

It Is Okay To Do/Wear What Feels Sexy

Following on from the above point, there is absolutely nothing to lose but everything to gain by doing or wearing what makes you feel sexy. Even if it isn’t on your partners list of things they love to see you in, I am convinced that if we feel sexier we act sexier. So if their preference is for Latex, but you rock up in a lingerie ensemble that gets you going, then I don’t think they’ll be complaining. Sometimes the confidence boost we need isn’t an obvious one, for some of us it might be killer heels or wicked eyeliner, for others it might be jeans and a t-shirt. I am a big believer in what makes you feel good is well worth bringing into a scene, because that confidence will shine out of you and make you even more irresistible than you already are.

Your Sexy Doesn’t Have To Be My Sexy

Lingerie is a big business, as is Latex for us kinky folk. If nothing that is traditionally orIMG_6836.JPG commercially pegged as ‘sexy’ floats your boat then that doesn’t mean you can’t rock a sexy outfit. I have on more than one occasion turned Bakji’s head with my £4 Primark leggings! My gym wear also has the desired effect. I think if we dig a little deeper in to what makes our partners sexy minds tick, there is a lot of room for imagination when it comes to creating a look you will both find appealing. This applies to the words we use, the kinks we play with and anything else we choose to incorporate into our sexy lives. If something gets you and/or your partner off and you’re both happy to engage in it said activity then I don’t think it matters if anyone else would find it sexy.

Sensory Deprivation as a Tool

If you main concern is looking silly if you get things wrong when taking charge of a sexy session, then sensory deprivation is your friend. I found a blindfold invaluable when I started Topping Bakji, if he couldn’t see me then he had no idea what I was doing. Even if I was stood dithering about what to do next, he just felt the anticipation of not knowing what was coming. Depending on what your partner is into, and how far you are willing to take this, we have also used sound reducing headphones, gags and restraint all to the effect of helping me feel more at ease with being in control.

Talk About Your Kinks

One of the other reasons I decided I want to give FemDom a try was Bakji’s enthusiasm over what it entailed for him. Knowing how exciting it could be if we enjoyed it together was a really great reason to try it. In talking through what he really loved, I learnt what things would be almost fail safe ways to get him aroused and feeling subby. If we hadn’t taken that time to get to know each others kinks and sexual turn ons, I’m certain it would have taken me a lot longer to gain the confidence I now have when Topping him.

Are there other things stopping you from giving something a try? Or have you got other ways you found your confidence in kink? Either way I would love to hear from you. You can get in touch through any of my social media links or you can leave a comment below.