‘Well, there’s a first time for everything …’
It’s not often I get to use those words in relation to sex, or relationships in general I suppose. I figure that once we get to a certain point in life a lot of our first times have been and gone and in my experience, that’s usually a good thing. The knowledge you have about yourself and your body from having done things before tends to make things better and more enjoyable.
Even when it comes to first times with a new partner, those moments are so sparkly in their newness and excitement but quite often the further down the line you go with someone the more your shared experiences deepen your connection and the intensity and satisfaction of your intimate moments together grows.
Of course, there are exceptions to all of this. I’ve had relationships in which time has seen us grow further apart, not closer together, where the shared sexual history didn’t strengthen our bond because our sexual compatibility was actually pretty poor. Conversely, I’ve had encounters with someone for the first time that have been gratifying in and of themselves and I never felt the need to go back for more.
With Mr F there haven’t been many moments that have been firsts for both of us. That doesn’t take the shine of our shared experiences in the least though. Doing things together is wonderful regardless of how many times we might have done them before with other people. However, this week I had cause to say, ‘Well, that’s a first …’ and it made us both chuckle and I think the situation behind why I said it is definitely worth discussing on the blog.
One of the side effects of my pregnancy seems to be that I am becoming a lot more inclined to squirt when being fingered. Normally if this happens I’m a gusher, not strictly a squirter. It doesn’t do the whole porno shooting out like a pressure washer thing, instead it just gushes out and usually trickles down onto my bum and puts a little wet pat on the sheet!
I couldn’t always squirt, it probably started happening around 8 years ago and it was a fairly infrequent occurrence. High hydration and being extremely turned on were a must, alongside a very specific type of fingering. I was never that bothered about it happening or not happening, it was just one of those things that I sometimes did and that was that.
Lately, Mr F can get it to happen almost every time we fuck. I have never changed my bedsheets so much in my entire life. We definitely need to start remembering to put a towel down because it is definitely getting wetter as the weeks go by. I think a big part of why it is happening more is due to the changes pregnancy hormones are bringing to my vagina. It’s puffier, squishier, lots of blood flowing to the area and it is definitely more sensitive and more orgasmic.
The other reason I think we are having more squirty fun is that Mr F clearly enjoys making it happen. He could easily be a little less vigorous, which would still be entirely pleasurable for me, but his choice (with my consent of course) is to truly go for it and cause the sexy fun times fluids to fly and lately fly is a very accurate description. The first time I realised it had become less gush and more projectile squirt was when I felt it land on my belly! Once we lay there post fuck though, giggling like we usually do because no matter how many times we do it, for some reason it always gives us the giggles, Mr F enlightened me as to just how squirty it got.
‘I think I need a drink’, not an uncommon thing for me to say post fuckery and of course, I mean water, not a shot of vodka, especially during pregnancy!
‘I’m not surprised, you squirted so much you got me in the face!’
‘OMG! I what? That’s never happened before! Well, there’s a first time for everything I guess.’
Despite the fact I know he purposely instigates the squirting and finds it sexy, enjoyable and yeah, maybe a little funny, which I see as a good thing, I still felt this little bubble of awkwardness floating inside me. I know there’s no need for it, none at all. As I sit here now I don’t think anyone should feel awkward or ashamed about any of the things our bodies do naturally during sex, or not during sex for that matter.
It’s interesting to me that regardless of how confident we might be, or how sex-positive we are, many of us and I know I’m not alone in this still have those body-related moments where our instinct is to hide behind our hands to cover our blushes, even when our partner is already counting down to the next time they get to do the exact same thing with us.
Since I started writing this post, which was written over a few days because pregnancy, homeschooling and life just kept distracting me, Mr F has already tried to achieve squirty goodness again. It was early morning though and I was that hydrated so it was a no go and his response to that was ‘it’s all good, we’ll just try again later’. He is fascinated to see how wet things get and if by the end of my pregnancy it will be a tsunami of squirt covering him from head to toe and I honestly think he’d be made up if that is the case.
I truly always believed I had a good level of acceptance for my body and all things related to it, but as I’ve mentioned before Mr F has shone a light on the fact that this isn’t always the case and I have in some ways internalised some negative thoughts that have been sent my way either by society or by other peoples comments. His acceptance of my body seems unconditional though and it truly makes me stop in my tracks and think ‘why the fuck am I worrying then’. The truth is I worry about things that the world has conditioned to worry about, I am trying very hard to throw all that bullshit out though because it clearly is not needed.
With that in mind, I am going to embrace and enjoy the squirty fucking and I shall let you all know if we unlock the tsunami squirt achievement.