On Saturdays I usually do a #SoSS Saturdays post and I will be including an element of that in this post, but I’m also going to be very Floss focused. Self promotion can be a really tricky thing to do, but right now self promotion and pushing myself forward as a worthy candidate for things is quite literally putting food on the table.
As some of you know, but many of you might have missed, I am no longer in the employment of the tattoo studio I was working for. The simple reason being is the man running it showed his true colours one too many times and I stood up to a bully. I will not be a verbal punching bag for anyone, and quite frankly it makes me uncomfortable watching someone else allow that to happen to them and that was the situation I was in. So I left. Whether I was pushed or whether I jumped is up for debate, but either way I have no job.
As I was only going my apprenticeship and due to the nature of the tattoo industry in my town walking into a similar position will be extremely unlikely and may no pay the bills quick enough. Due to the nature of my Instagram and the topics I discuss here and on the podcast I often get asked for certain services, such as; nudes, cam work, phone sex, key holding services and much more.
On Monday I discussed in my Masturbation Monday post how I am trying to challenge myself as a writer. There are certain things I rarely so as a writer. I rarely if ever name my characters, and I am not great at writing pieces that follow on from one another. I thought my recent involvement in #friflash might be a really good place to stretch myself with regards to those things and it would be remiss of me not to mention that F Dot Leanora who runs the prompt, actually is one of the people who inspired me to give this a go.
Again I ask you to bear with me while I flex my creative muscles. Things may not always be as well rounded as some of my previous pieces, but I hope over time they will start to become better as I familiarise myself with new ways to write.
My hands shook as I dialled her number. I could have sent a text, but I couldn’t handle waiting for a response. Plus I wanted to hear her voice, and I needed to hear the tone with which she responded to my question.
She answered quickly, sure and clear with her hello, the unknown number didn’t fluster her like it would have done me.
‘Hi .. it’s .. errr, me .. from the cafe.’
‘Oh hello errrmefromthecafe. I’m so happy you called.’
Setting up a blog is fairly easy. There a wide range of platforms where you can have a blog set up in minutes. Feeling your a legitimate blogger and not an imposter though is much harder. When asked why we write, many of us will give answers that revolve around doing it for ourselves, myself included. While that is true, I think once you start putting your words on a public platform, it is also nice to know you’re not talking into the void.
When I comment on the various memes I get involved in, especially Sinful Sunday because I endeavour to view and comment on every picture, I often notice that some of the newer participants were getting far less comments than the regulars. I understand not everyone can dedicate the time to comment on every image. Or every blog post if it’s Wicked Wednesday or Masturbation Monday, I myself can’t always do that because reading is far more of a time commitment than viewing images. Quick shout out to Friday Flash as well because I’ve also recently given that a go for the first time.
Her hands move deftly, caressing her camera like a lover. I watch enthralled as she captures the fair lady’s face with her lens. All too soon she is on the move, and my eyes fall to the mural of Audrey Hepburn that so appealed to her.
She’s cute and I’m a coward. My feet betray me though and follow her into the cafe adjacent to the mural. Most seats are taken, with many patrons choosing to stand as they chat and devour delicious pastries. She however has found a seat, at a table for two.
Camera in hand she flicks through the images she has taken, her facial expressions mesmerise me as she reviews the images she has procured.
In another lapse of being myself, I ask if the seat at her table is free. It is. I am sitting with the cute girl wondering how to eat a pastry in front of her with getting crumbs in my hair or spilling coffee down my blouse.
Unexpectedly she looks at me, perhaps into me? She makes my insides burn, my outsides too. I’m blushing hard. I should speak, but while she is looking at me at I can barely breathe let alone form coherent sentences.
‘Do you always follow girls into cafes?
I answer it in a questioning tone, kicking myself for not saying something smooth like ‘only the cute ones’, but why be cool when I can be a dork. Apparently that’s her thing though and she bursts out laughing.
‘Well when you know for certain could you let me know? I don’t want to be one of many, but I could be down with being an exception.’
The sparkle in her eyes is wicked.
This is confirmed when she stands up, takes my hand and leads me away. I leave my pastry behind without question. Who am I today?
We are in the ladies bathroom before I know it. Which isn’t always classy, but today it is the greatest adventure.
Her lips are on mine, soft and inviting. Our breasts are touching, clothes from an infuriating barrier, but still it feels amazing. My fingers snake into her hair and she moans, and I think I could come from that sound alone. I come, that’s true, but not from that. I come when her own fingers slip underneath my soaked panties and find in lightening speed that spot that makes the world blur and my body convulse with pleasure.
My hands fall to my side, the wall supports my weight as she steps back from me, the wicked sparkle in her eyes remains. In seconds her camera is back in her hands, she takes my picture and before I can object she has kissed me on the cheek and fled, leaving me bereft and wishing I had her number.
Thankfully my skirt had pockets, which is rare and awesome, and cute girl had business cards.
My pastry was still on the table too.
A great adventure indeed.
This is my first time getting involved with F Dot Leonora’s Friday Flash prompt. Writing less is not my comfort zone but I loved the challenge and hope to do more. Why not give it a go yourself and see what wonderful tales you can create in 500 words or less.
If you enjoy the content I provide both here and as part of the #ProudToBeKinky Podcast and you would like to support that, then likes and comments are joyful to receive and you can also click below to support me through Ko-fi.
I’m not big on the ‘L’ word, when I saw it was the prompt for the week I was doing the round-up for Wicked Wednesday I really did think that was vaguely comical. In the three years I have been intimately involved with Bakji I have probably said it no more than dozen times, maybe even less than 10. Or it could be more but I might have been drunk for many of them.
In addition to the above, which must seem like a terrible admission, It took me about 2 years to say ‘I love you’, I felt it after about 3 months, at 4 months I realised I wasn’t going to undo the horror of ‘falling in love’ and promised myself that if I felt the same after 6 months I’d say it. Then for many a fucked up reason I decided to never say it, would be a wiser decision.
What happened in the absence of I love you was actually quite sweet, we found different ways to express our affection, both of us I think not daring or wanting to declare too much. I think we each had our own reasons for that, but I think in part for both of us it was not wanting to ‘jinx it’.
Even now it is something we say very infrequently, but when it is said it is rather lovely, I have to admit that. Discussing why I felt the way I do, or feel the way I do about ‘I love you’ is well known to me, but would be thoroughly depressing to write about. A lot of it is irrational and I need to let so much of it go, and I’m working on that, sort of, but I think this is one case where writing out just won’t help.
Instead I want to focus on something positive. Well ten positives actually. In a somewhat uncharacteristic display of unabashed affection I would like to share with you 10 things I love about Bakji, all of which show that he is to blame for me catching feelings in the first place.
He is super funny!
Anyone who listens to the podcast will have heard my eye-rolls when Bakji interrupts me with yet another joke. Don’t be fooled though, those eye-rolls are nearly always accompanied by a grin and he has made me laugh every single day for the last three years. He is so silly sometimes and he think up daft games for us to play to keep me entertained. My own nature is far more serious and I need that laughter in my life. That he not only can make me laugh, but is so happy to do so, is truly one of my favourite things about him
He helps me try new things!
The amount of new things I’ve tried and discovered I love since meeting Bakji is a really long list. From podcasts to food, and of course new kinks. I have discovered more about myself in three years than I did in the previous 30! He does this by sharing his likes with me, and not being a bumhead when I decide to copy. He suggests new things to me and is happy when I seem curious and decide maybe I’d like that thing too.
He’s kind and generous
In the early days of our sexy friendship I was very careful not to overshare. No mentioning my worries, no boring him with the drudgery of my life as a parent, keeping the conversation light and as carefree as possible was my main aim. I was determined to never seem ill, or out of sorts and vowed that if I ever was those things then Bakji wouldn’t be dealing with them. As time has gone on hiding all those things from someone has been impossible, and when I have shared these things with Bakji he has always been the sweetest and most loving person I could ask for, and when and where he can he is always generous in terms of helping me make things better. I still dig my heels in sometimes when it comes to being looked after, but it’s actually a wonderful thing to know that he there for me when I need him.
He loves going on adventures with me
When I first joined the kink community one of the things I was searching for was adventure. By adventure I don’t necessarily mean distant travels to far away lands, although I’m not saying no to that if someone is offering. Adventures to me can be all kinds of things, for Bakji and I our adventures together began with travelling to kink events. Living outside of London meant lots of car journeys. We would drive to London, park near the event venue, have our fun, then drive home again at any time between 1am and 4am! Usually falling into bed between 6am and 7am. It never failed to shock people, but it was fun and we were doing it all together which made it even better. We’ve also had adventures in learning rope, adventures into new realms of kinky fun and adventures in non-monogamy. It was also only this year that we actually did go on an international adventure and that was an amazing adventure for sure. I know we have many more adventures to come and I can’t wait for them all.
He gives the best cuddles and snuggles
Physical affection is something that does not come naturally to me. No big bad reason for that. It’s just the way I am, with everyone. When I met Bakji and we started doing kinky things together the aftercare bit was not what I was expecting. Content to be left alone he would initiate a hug, and I think it may have been the first time we did this I actually said ‘we don’t have to hug’, his reply to which was he would like to, if that’s okay. It was different, but it wasn’t an issue so we began to hug more and somewhere along the line I began to love those cuddles. They are so good. I’m still not the best at initiating them. I do it far more than I ever imagined I would though and I love snuggling with Bakji, especially when we have sleepovers and we are all cosy in bed together. It is one of the best feelings in the world.
He’s gorgeous and sexy
Is it cheating to include this one I wonder? Maybe, but I feel like it would be less authentic if I didn’t include it because I’d be lying if I said Bakji’s gorgeous face wasn’t one of the first things that I noticed about him. He is so pretty. Three years down the line and he is even more gorgeous now than he was when I first met him and that is quite an achievement. His body was so enticing that it made me decide that I need to learn rope and take up Topping. I know some people find focusing on physical attraction shallow, but that physical attraction and chemistry we have together is all part of what made the deeper feelings develop. Without that initial ‘phwoar, I want some of that sexy’ we may not be where we are at all.
He listens and hears
One of the things I have often found frustrating is when I try to talk something through with someone and they offer me a solution based not on what I said, or meant, but based on what they decided I’d said. Listening is one thing, but actually hearing someone is a whole other skill set. I am forever grateful that Bakji doesn’t just listen to me, but he hears me too. He doesn’t leap to solutions either,thought he does offer his assistance if he feels it’s appropriate. Often though I don’t need him to fix anything for me, I say often because sometimes I really do need that, most of all though what I’m usually looking for is just a sounding board or a listening ear and someone to tell me it will be okay. The fact that Bakji actually gets this means a lot.
He’s unapologetic about being himself
We do not have the most conventional of relationships and we have no desire to follow the more regular steps of the relationship escalator as it were. We both have our own reasons for this, some overlap, some don’t. What I have always respected about Bakji is that he has no desire to pander to society and apologise for not wanting some of the things that may be expected from him. In the beginning this meant that I didn’t quite appreciate that our relationship could and eventually develop in something a little more meaningful than I had initially imagined. It was I think a reason I didn’t really keep my guard up, because I didn’t think there was anything to guard against. Not wanting to live together or use more familiar (to society) terminology for our dynamic doesn’t make it any less special though. I think Bakji always new these things, and a multitude of other things, and it took me some time to figure them out. I’m glad I did though because I adore the slightly random way in which we have combined sexy forces and feel blessed to have done so without either of us having to have compromised on things that are deal breakers for us. (Just to add we do compromise overall, we are no immovable and unfeeling objects.)
He challenges me to be better
Not as in ‘I challenge thee to duel, be better now or I shall poke thee with my fighting stick’, although now I’ve written that I’m having thoughts about his ‘fighting stick’ (yes I do mean willy) and I think improvements could be made faster if he threatened me with it more. In all seriousness though, there are some people who drag you down in life, and some who lift you up. Quite often it’s not even about whether or not they try to do those things, it’s just human nature. Bakji is thankfully one of those people who lifts you up. He is organised, driven and always on the lookout to improve himself or learn new things. He does those things for him, but witnessing them makes me want to do them for myself too. I think I’m yet to make the leap from better self to best self, but these things don’t happen overnight and luckily I have a Bakji to keep me company along the way.
I sometimes get messages on Instagram asking if I’m ‘single’ which isn’t actually true or false, non-monogamy and/or polyamory rather changes the way you need to ask and answer that question. I am however not ‘available’ to them, so I always say no, and because I don’t care to give them my life story I simply say I ‘have a partner’. To which they always nearly always reply, ‘oh, I bet he wouldn’t like knowing you show the world your arse/sell men nudes/are a massive cok tease’ etc. Not only does he know, but he wholeheartedly support me doing things that a) entertain me and b) earn me some extra monies. He is supportive of me in so many ways and he is supportive of me for the best reason ever, he simply wants good things for me. He also trusts me not to do anything stupid, like sell a kidney for a fiver or meet a random stranger offering me 50p for a blowjob.
There we have it, 10 delightful things that I love about Bakji, or things about Bakji that make me love him, I’m not really sure which way round it works. Either way though, he is the most awesome sexy-friend a girl could ask for.
Written for this weeks Wicked Wednesday prompt, please do check out the other blog post that are added to the link up, my fellow bloggers never disappoint and you will definitely find some sexy and interesting reads there.
If you enjoy the content I provide both here and as part of the #ProudToBeKinky Podcast and you would like to support that, then likes and comments are joyful to receive and you can also click below to support me through Ko-fi
I wanted to do a ‘New Blogger Special for #SoSS this weekend, and while I have definitely got some great blogs to recommend, I’m greedy and I want more. I am going to spend the next week finding new blogs, so that I can share them with you for next weeks #SoSS. If you have started your blog since January and you’d like me to give you a shout out then please say hello in the comments below.
As you know I am a big fan of Masturbation Monday and Wicked Wednesday, for lots of reasons but one of them being that it makes sure I remember to visit some of my favourite blogs, even when life is busy and time is short. This week I submitted to both memes, A Twist of Fate for Masturbation Monday and Nurse Floss Will See You Now for Wicked Wednesday.
This week for #SoSS I have picked 3 writers I have not shared before (at least not that I remember) whose posts definitely got me hot under the collar this week.
It’s been a while since I joined in with TMI Tuesday, but I really do find it a fun way for my readers to get to know me better. Hopefully with more time to blog now I will be getting involved on a weekly basis. Please do consider getting involved and take a look through the other blog that are joining in.
1. You can only keep 3 things: (pick and explain your choices)
Coffee Jewelry Books Chocolate Wine or Beer Netflix Tacos
Books, Chocolate and Netflix. Books because I think the world would be a much duller place if I didn’t have the wonderful writing of other to explore. Chocolate because I have a crazy sweet tooth and the thought of never eating chocolate again makes me feel quite sad! I try to eat it moderately but when I do eat it I LOVE it. Netflix because it’s the only access I have to T.V shows (I don’t own a Television), and sometimes it really is just nice to relax with a bar of chocolate and a few episodes of something I enjoy. Gives my brain a bit of a break from the thinking it seems to do constantly.