Tag: BDSM Blog

[Review] Black Leather Heart Collar from Bondara

I am working on a blog post about collars and collaring, and I reached out on Twitter to see if any companies would like to help me explore my own personal experience with collars a little bit. Bondara very kindly responded to my request for help, and sent me two collars, the idea being that they would help me explore collars in a different way to the only one we currently use.

One of the collars I was sent was the Lair Black Leather Studded Heart Collar. I’ll be honest the reason this collar was one that appealed to me was because it was cute and I had visions of Bakji getting his submission on in a super cute heart collar. However, as soon as it arrived my feelings on the matter changed.

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[Kink] Getting Risky Makes Me Frisky

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Who else is discussing KOTW?

When I saw the Kink of The Week was risky sex I immediately got excited, then I realised I probably don’t have much risky sex and felt a bit deflated. When I sat and pondered my reactions I realised a two things:

  • I assumed in my own mind risky sex alluded to things like getting caught
  • I assumed sex referred to traditional sexual activity

This was daft because the actually Kink of the Week post included much more that as as inspiration, but I guess my mind was just having a silly pickle moment. It was those assumptions though that left me feeling like this wasn’t a topic for me. While I do enjoy sexual activity in my sexy times, it isn’t always our primary focus when compared to kink activities and it is very rare that it is non-kinky sex. We also don’t engage outdoor sex or any risk associated with getting caught. This is not a reflection on our feelings surrounding other people doing it. It just doesn’t get us off.

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[Kink] A Switchy Girl’s Guide To … BDSM Roles and Labels

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When you first venture into the kink community, whether that’s by going to a munch or by joining something like Fetlife one of the first questions you are likely to be asked, in form or other, is about how you identify in terms of a BDSM role. For many people the role or label they adopt within the kink community or within their specific dynamic is extremely important to them. It’s not just about BDSM it’s part of their identity as a person and as such it is a wonderful way in which they can express part of who they are.

Then there are people like me, who stumble into the kink scene with a vague idea of what they’re into, assume a label that compliments that and then find after a time that something doesn’t feel right. For me that label was submissive, after all I wanted to be tied up and spanked, what’s not submissive about that? In truth there is plenty about those things that aren’t submissive.

Continue reading “[Kink] A Switchy Girl’s Guide To … BDSM Roles and Labels”

[FemDom Friday] It’s Okay For Submissives To Have A Voice

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My own D/s dynamic only comes into play when we engage in kinky scenes. However I stand by the message of this article regardless of whether you have an in scene dynamic only or a 24/7 Master/slave dynamic and I am prepared for the onslaught of emails telling me I am wrong, but I think it is very important for some people to hear my take on this.

Regardless of your specific D/s dynamic or the frequency of it, your submissive does not cease to be a human being, and as such they have their own thoughts, feelings and desires. While the Dominant one in the dynamic may well do a lot of the leading and decision making, again depending on your specific situation, no Dominant is all knowing. Despite the spate of ‘Dominants’ who seem to think they are just that.

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[Life] Feeling Sexy

What type of clothes make you feel sexy?

  • a specially selected casual outfit
  • lingerie or silky pyjamas
  • elegant, dressy evening clothes
  • anything that leaves me almost naked

All sorts of clothes make me feel sexy. Latex is a big one for me, there is so much about why I love it that it would be a blog post all on its own. However Latex isn’t the most practical of sexy clothing so I do were a lot of lace, fishnet and leather. High heels are another instant win in terms of feeling sexy. The right heels, a good set of underwear and a nice pair of fishnets would definitely push all of my feeling sexy buttons.

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[Kink] Communication: It’s Good For Ewe

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Apologies for the terrible pun of title, but I couldn’t resist when I decided to use this photo off Pixabay for my featured image. 

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One of the most recurring topics of conversation about how to do kink ‘right’ is about communication. What kinks people have and how they enjoy them is 100% down to their personal preferences, provided of course that they are engaging in them with other consenting adults. For many of us though good communication is a fundamental part of exploring kink. What ‘good’ looks like may indeed vary from person to person, and I think like myself and Bakji, your ‘good’ becomes better over time, and your old ‘good’ looks a little lacking.

Myself and Bakji have grown together in terms of improving our communication and honestly it has been one of the most rewarding parts of our sexy-friendship. Neither of us were great at face to face discussions in the early days, and that meant finding more creative ways of sharing our thoughts with each other.

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[Kink] Nurse Floss Will See You Now!

Content Warning: Contains thoughts surrounding medical play, blood play, needles and mobility aids as kink equipment.


When I first saw this weeks prompt I was going to attempt a piece of erotica based around one of the only uniforms that I’d like to involve in my own kinky fun, the more I thought on it though the more I thought I should explore the fantasy itself.

One of the main areas of kink that I am keen to explore is medical play. When I’ve mentioned this on social media many of my followers have send DM’s asking me what that even is. In a nutshell it is an umbrella term referring to a number of kinks and fetishes involving objects, practices, environments, and situations of a medical or clinical nature

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[Kink] Is BDSM Curious a Valid Kink?

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The wonderful Posy Churchgate wrote a piece for this week’s Masturbation Monday called ‘Under My Thumb.’ At the end of the piece, which I found to be a very thought provoking read, and while I began to comment on her post directly, I feel that my thoughts might be suited to some of my readers here.

 

Can You Be ‘BDSM Curious’?

“Since joining the kink community which surrounds the Twitter sex bloggers, I have begun to refer to myself as BDSM curious.  I don’t know if it’s an actual ‘thing’ …” – Posy Churchgate

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