Category: Female Led Relationships

Erotica – Addressing His Needs

SinfulSundayLips150I often mention Sinful Sunday on my blog, either when submitting and image or as part of #SoSS posts when I am able to do them. When perusing the submissions for the first weekend of June, which was prompt week, one particular image inspired a line of thinking that ended up being a full blown story. Cousin Pons posted a picture of his feet titled ‘Underneath the Arches‘, and it got me to pondering what a story where a man feet were the catalyst for action. While that isn’t necessarily the story I ended up with, I am actually very fond of the piece of fiction below that did transpire from that initial idea. Thank you Cousin Pons for triggering some inspiration and very much hope you don’t mind me mentioned you image as my starting point for this piece.


Dinner has been served and devoured. As always his culinary skills are only outdone by his commitment to serving me. He works long days, as well as performing his duties for me, and it is appreciated that he never waivers in what is asked of him. He is instructed to sit and relax for a few moments while I prepare myself for our session.

When I return to him he has fallen asleep. Dozing peacefully in his favourite chair, his feet resting on the large footstool in front of him.

I am in charge. My will becomes his with every command I give. If I wake him now and inform him that we are continue our evening session as planned I know he will obey my wishes, without complaint, no matter how tired he is.

As I look upon him though I decide that a change of plan is in order. Moments later my hand is swirling in bubbly bath water and my massage oils are gathered on the side waiting to be put to use. Once the bath is ready, slightly hotter than necessary so it can cool while we busy ourselves with other things, I head downstairs to continue with our evening.

He is still dozing when I warm the oils between my palms, before slowly smoothing my chosen scent onto his feet! My touch begins to rouse him, and he is soon muttering apologies for falling asleep, for not doing the dishes, for ruining the plans. All of which are appreciated, none of which are needed.

He looks at me with a puzzled expression, clearly wondering what the new plans for this evening are. I simply tell him to relax, as my fingers deftly move around the soles of his feet. Relishing the feel of his flesh beneath my own, reflecting on the beauty of what is mine.

As my hands move up his legs, lingering to massage his calves, I giggle to myself at how backward this scene would seem to some people. The Mistress massaging her slave, the lack of punishment for his audacity to fall asleep. Gentle, loving touches replacing the cruel, ballbusting FemDom image that frequents porn. Many ‘One True Way’ Dominant’s would say the Sadism and control is what being a Dominant is all about but I would disagree,

I can feel his body relaxing beneath my touch, and my eyes are drawn to his cock, straining against his chastity cage. As I reach for the key around my neck and release him, his eyes fly open. The shock of being freed waking him from his docile headspace. His mouth opens to speak, but once again I state that it is my wish for him to relax.

Returning to the massage I spend a long time on his thighs, strong and firm. I remember all the times they’ve been on display, with legs raised, or in doggy style eagerly taking my strapon. The begging, the moaning, the pure unadulterated pleasure that pulses through me as I slide inside him. Now isn’t the time to satisfy that particular desire, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun.

Sufficiently relaxed and zoned out he doesn’t register the removal of leggings and knickers. It is only when my thighs straddle his, in his thankfully spacious arm chair, that he becomes aware of my intentions. His voice hesitant he asks if he can touch me, the spirit of this spontaneous change of plans has me saying yes, adding that he has a free reign to touch me anywhere and everywhere during the session.

His hands grip my bottom as I lower myself onto him and it’s me that is moaning in pleasure now. He responds with more touches, alternating between all the spots that he knows will have me aching greedily for more. His mouth finds my nipples and I hold his head to my breast, stifling his breathing while he sucks and nibbles. He may have been given certain freedoms, but he is still mine to do as I wish with.

Certain liberties are taken though, and we are having so much fun, that saying anything but yes is out of the question. He has gradually made his way to the edge of the chair, and with his hands firmly gripping my arse cheeks to support me he stands up and lowers me down onto the chair, pushing the footstool against it so I can wriggle forward and lie back, my feet propped gently on the edge of the footstool. 

Fingers find their way, tentatively dancing between my folds in case I withdraw his permission to play freely. I don’t though, not today. He wastes no time in bringing me right to the edge of orgasm, and when I fall over that edge, wow do I fall. The combination of pleasure he uses is a heady mix. His finger work and his perfectly place thrusts once he has moved to using his cock, as his hands roughly use my breasts to steady himself, all of this alone would be enough to cause me to climax. His body language though is what truly causes my pleasure to soar today.

Kneeling on the floor his pelvis is perfectly aligned with mine as I lie back on the footstool and armchair, his head is bowed, and as cliche as it sounds, he reminds me of a man at prayer. I am both his Goddess and his Temple in these moments; he enters me, to worship me, to get lost in and find clarity in the belief he has in me and it is beyond a pleasure to be those things for him.

To onlookers, the D/s dynamic we have might be lost on them if they were to see the deep, hard fucking he was giving me, and the bruises that are surely forming from his grip on my breasts will not scream ‘caused by a submissive male’, but the words he manages to utter between heavy breathing and moans of satisfaction tell me everything is just as it should be.

‘Please may I come Mistress.’

With that he raises his head for the first time and holds my gaze, it is always my choice as to whether or not he comes. Sometimes the answer is yes, often the answer is no. I want him to feel that release today though, I want the ripples of orgasmic delight to ricochet through him, to render him spent and incapable of further action.

When his orgasm is complete he flops forwards, his head resting softly at my breast. His tiredness returning, now multiplied by his physical activity, his speech is a whisper, but I hear the words ‘Thank you Mistress’ fall from his lips, his breath tickling against my nipple as they do so.

Despite his tiredness, I rouse him and lead him upstairs. I can see mild hint of concern as to whether or not he will be capable of whatever I ask him, his weariness now thoroughly starting to set in again. When he sees the bath he smiles broadly and simply says; ‘For me?’

I nod my head and usher him forward. He sighs deeply as the water soothes him, it’s warmth penetrating him to his core, just as moments ago he had done to me. Sponge and soap at the ready, I start to wash him, my hands taking occasional detours along my favourite parts of him. We do this in silence as he rests, slowly being beckoned towards sleep once more. I know once he his dry he will fall into bed, and sleep will comes in an instant.

Tomorrow when he wakes he will ask me, as he always does, and as many others have before, and will again, why I do this for him? My answer is simple, caring is not an act of submission, I am not betraying my role as Dominant by looking after him when I see fit to do so. He is mine, I own him, he is my property and my most treasured possession at that. Why would I not care for something  so precious to me? Why would I not ensure that he is fit, healthy and well rested? All of which he needs to be to serve me as beautifully as he does.

In many ways I am at my most Dominant in these moments. Taking charge and doing what needs to be done, at times when he may not realise he needs these things himself.


I am submitting this piece for this weeks Masturbation Monday, if you want to see who else is providing delightful words for your masturbatory pleasure then please do follow the link below.

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Erotica – Just Like a Lamb

He is such a good boy. Waiting. Patiently.

He looks fucking glorious, and he is glorious to fuck. Collar on, he kneels in the centre of the room. You arrive first as planned and we continue to adorn him with his accessories of submission. Ankle and wrist cuffs, his harness and for the time being a blindfold and a gag.

Our eyes meet as we stand either side of him and I’m compelled to touch you. The collusion in planning this for him has brought us closer together. I am delighted to find you are as wet as I am as my hand reaches under your skirt. My finger moves between your slick and inviting labia … and the doorbell goes!

Continue reading “Erotica – Just Like a Lamb”

Cuckolding. It’s Not Completely Cuckoo!

Cuckolding. Is It What You Think It Is?

The dictionary definition of a cuckold is, ‘the husband of an adulteress, often regarded as an object of derision.’ In terms of cuckolding as a kink or Fetish there is a lot missing from that sentence to get a clear picture of why people enjoy cuckolding with the kink community.

I’m going to start with the term adulteress. Adultery is defined as extramarital sex that is objectionable on the grounds of social, religious, moral or legal grounds. In terms of consensual cuckolding as part of a kink lifestyle, I don’t think many people would identify themselves as an adulterer. While society may class any extramarital sex as adultery, when the sex in question is strengthening or adding to your marriage or long term relationship, it doesn’t really come under the same category as infidelity.

There are many branches of non-monogamy, some of which are more familiar overall than others, but all of which are misunderstood by anyone not well versed in them. Cuckolding is no different. Within the kink community anyone who is engaged with cuckolding, if doing it in a healthy manner, will have consent from all parties involved, boundaries and/or limits they adhere to and lots of communication.

There are as many ways to conduct a cuckolding relationship as there are people into it. It isn’t one size fits all and we shouldn’t assume everyone does it for the same reasons. Yes many men who identify as a cuckold will be into humiliation and that will be huge part of the dynamic with his partner, however many men will not engage in the humiliation element of cuckolding and their dynamic will focus on other aspects that cuckolding can encourage.

The paragraph above was very gender specific, which is something I normally try to avoid, but I specifically went there because when most people think of cuckolding they think of a cisgendered heterosexual man, whose wife or certainly female partner is cheating on him with another man or multiple men. As with most, if not all kinks though, cuckolding does not have to be, and is not gender specific. People can be into cuckolding no matter their gender, sexuality or kink identity.

If It Isn’t Always About Humiliation, What is It About?

Validation of Choices – Have you ever felt pleased when someone complimented you on a new purchase? Be that shoes or car. Knowing someone else is attracted to your partner can cause that same feeling. That isn’t to say that this kind of validation is needed for people to love or be attracted to their partner, but it can certainly enhance arousal.

Power Exchange – Being stripped of your ability to have input while your partner engages in sexual activity, while you not only get none for yourself but may also be ‘forced’ to watch as they fuck someone else can be an extremely arousing situation for some people. It is worth repeating that these kinds of dynamics need clear negotiation and explicit consent before being embarked upon.

Sexual Arousal – For many people it is arousing to see their partner or hear about their partner being sexual with another person. There will be no more or no less to it than that.

Exploration of Taboos – Exploring and experiencing things we have grown up being told are wrong can be a really powerful sexual motivator. Cuckolding lends itself well to many people exploring a lot of societal taboos.

Escapism – As with many kinks, engaging in cuckolding will be a way of letting go and escaping the everyday for many people. That isn’t to say there aren’t 24/7 lifestyle cuckolds, of course there are. There are probably more casual cuckolds though who simply enjoy it when they can to take a step away from daily grind for a while.

Chastity – Lots of men are into chastity. Not all of them are into cuckolding. However, for some men into chastity one of the things that makes being locked away even hotter is knowing that other penises are free to fuck the woman that owns their very locked up cock.

Humiliation – Why have I have saying it isn’t about humiliation only to go and say it is? Easy, because when people think of the humiliation aspect they often get it wrong. Erotic humiliation can be extremely arousing and powerful form of emotional masochism. To engage in humiliation in a healthy and constructive manner you need to have oodles of trust in your partner, great communication skills and a really good idea of what humiliation means to you. Humiliating your partner without their consent is just abuse, fucking someone else to humiliate your partner without their consent is cruel not kinky. Being able to embrace your desire to be humiliated takes a lot of strength and courage, so it doesn’t necessarily correlate with the usual assumption of a cuckold being weak.

Cuckold? Really? Can We Have Another Word?

The origin of the word cuckold comes from the Cuckoo* bird’s habit of laying its eggs in another birds nest, therefore the unwitting bird will raise offspring that is not its own. Originally being used to refer to men whose partners were deceiving them by sleeping with another man, or men who were unwittingly raising another man’s offspring. With means that it is a somewhat imprecise term for many people who are into cuckolding.

IMG_7318.JPGAlternatives are thin on the ground though, and probably don’t provide many better options. HotWife lifestyle is probably the only other descriptive that offers similar activities but without the associated negative connotations of its roots being in infidelity and humiliation. However I am well aware many people would not feel it is suitable for them, and I am neither supporting nor condemning it.

*Because disclaimers are all the rage I feel obliged to mention that not all species of Cuckoo do this. I do not want to offend any non-cuckolding Cuckoos or any Ornithologists.

When it comes to terminology, there are some options but again I don’t think they feel like the right fit for everyone. Especially if gender specific terms are not appropriate or wanted.

Cuckquean – Female variant of a cuckold

Bull – Man with whom a cuckold’s partner is having sex

Cuckcake – Woman with whom a cuckqueans partner is having sex

What if you are the partner who is free to enjoy sexual encounters while your cuckold stays home or watches the fun in some cases? You may be a CuckQueen (note this is different to cuckquean), Cuckoldress or HotWife. Interestingly male versions of these terms do not seem to exist, so make of that what you will.

Surely If The Terms Don’t Fit Your Kink Is Something Else?

Yes and no. There is a specific element of cuckolding that you don’t get with other branches of non-monogamy or kink. While your partner is fucking someone else, you aren’t. You’re not fucking them and you’re not fucking anyone else either. Maybe you’re watching, maybe you’re sat at home alone or maybe you’re at work knowing your partner is getting their kicks anywhere but with you. Why someone is turned on or content with that might vary, but the specific nature of cuckolding means that you are not providing the sexual pleasure.

Perhaps if we saw more positive and honest examples of this particular kink we would be able to move away from the negative and sometimes incorrect assumptions that usually come with it.

Floss Is Wrong and She’s Ruining My Life

Wow! Sucks to be you then.

On a more serious note I realise that for people who live this lifestyle I may not be supporting the truths of how they view cuckolding and what that means to them. Unfortunately though no matter who you are or what your kink is, it is going to evolve and cuckolding is no different.

It is evolving and as such demanding people do it in one particular way is going to achieve nothing. The ‘one true way’ BDSM folk are dwindling, though still existing I grant you that, because their reluctance to accept new and/or alternative ideas makes them seem unpleasant and elitist.

Surely someone understanding, supporting and embracing something even if only from time to time is better than them having no outlet for their desires and being unfulfilled.

Before, during and after I wrote this I perused cuckolding forums and cuckolding groups on Fetlife and Reddit to ensure I wasn’t making any absolutely absurd claims. I do not want to misrepresent anyone, and I do not speak for the entire kink community on this blog, what I do want to do though is challenge people’s assumptions of a wide variety of kinks and try to encourage more acceptance of not only kink in general, but for kinks that may not be our own.

My blog mainly reaches people who are new to kink and are looking to learn and as such I try present my information in a way that is supportive, non-judgemental; and will hopefully give people a starting point for what may or may not be their kink. For that reason it may not match your own experience if you have been in the lifestyle for a long time.

The interaction between myself and my readers is what truly keeps my blog going, your likes and comments always make me smile, if however you would like to support what I do in other ways you can follow the link below to buy me a coffee.

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FemDom Friday: FemDom Is For Switches Too

Switch – A person who may feel Dominant or submissive depending on their mood or their partner. Switching also encompasses those who identify as Top/bottom, and Sadist/masochist

I never would have found my love of FemDom if I hadn’t initially thought I was a submissive. When I joined the kink scene it was with the assumption that I would find a Dominant to explore my submissive side with. While in some ways that did happen, another and surprising thing happened too. I realised that while I do enjoy being a bottom, I have a great passion for Topping, and the resulting conclusion was that I am in fact a Switch.

Top – A person who is in control during a scene, this person may or may not identify as a Dominant

Bottom – A person who gives up control, receives physical sensation and/or verbal instruction during a scene from a Top, this person may or may not identify as submissive

Continue reading “FemDom Friday: FemDom Is For Switches Too”

FemDom Friday: Don’t Be Swayed By The Stereotypes

When I first tried my hand at Topping, it was not what I would call a success. I bought the clothes and the shoes that said ‘I am a Dominatrix’, my hair and makeup matched the stereotype that the word Dominatrix conjures. When it came to the nitty gritty though I found that style wasn’t enough, because in attempting to explore that side of myself, I wasn’t the ideal version of a Female Dominant that the people I was Topping had imagined I would be.

In my various wanderings around the internet, I have seen many women say they can’t be Dominant within their kink explorations for a myriad of reasons. The only reason that I believe to be valid for not trying FemDom is that is truly does not interest you. Being petite, having no sadistic inclinations, an attraction to men who take charge in their daily life, or who are physically stronger than you – none of these are to my mind barriers to exploring or enjoying FemDom.

Continue reading “FemDom Friday: Don’t Be Swayed By The Stereotypes”

The Tease of Chastity

I recently commented on a piece of my erotica that myself and Bakji have recently had a failed attempt at male chastity. A regular reader collaredmichael asked what happened and suggested it might be a future blog post. At the time I said it was a short story, and not really worthy of its own post, however the whole situation is starting to become more and more ludicrous, so perhaps now is the time to share.

Myself and Bakji have been discussing trying a cock cage for a fair while now. While we are not currently looking to explore long-term chastity, we are very keen to incorporate it into our scenes, and I have high hopes for using it when we spend weekends together. My imagination is completely captivated by this idea, as two recent erotic tales involving chastity probably shows.

Continue reading “The Tease of Chastity”

Figuring Out You Tasks and Rituals

N.B: This blog post was inspired an email from the Loving BDSM 30 Days of D/s. If you haven’t listened to their podcast yet please do so, you can also check out the website for great resources and links on how to listen or follow on social media.


This will be a short one, and also a request for ideas.

As anyone who has been reading along with these 30 Days of D/s posts or anyone who has read a variety of my posts on my blog will know, myself and Bakji don’t a formal D/s arrangement as such. It’s an in scene only, switchy dynamic. However for a little while now that switch dynamic has been flicked to FemDom.

Our scenes have a fair bit of variety to them. Sometimes I’m a sensual and loving Top and other times I’m power hungry, sadistic and aching to whisper humiliating things in Bakji’s ear. I enjoy both immensely, but neither of these come with tasks and rituals.

I’d imagine that tasks and rituals come into play for those people who have a more day-to-day D/s dynamic, but dammit, I want in. I want to find some sexy tasks and rituals we can incorporate into our scenes.

For the longest time I’ve wanted to think up a sexy mantra that Bakji can recite, and Honorifics have been on the list for a while too. I think with these I just need to get the ball rolling with them so that they become a natural part of our scenes.

We are about to take the plunge with chastity, not long-term, just in scene only. For now. *insert evil laugh here* I am ever hopeful that Bakji will love it so much we might be able to do it for at least a few days at a time! So I expect this might highlight some opportunities to tighten the rules a little bit.

Some of the other things we enjoy are body worship (especially bum and feet), humiliation (at the milder end but it’s still very sexy), edging, facesitting and restraint. More gets included too, but those are the main ones.

So my question to anyone reading, what are some of you favourite tasks and rituals? Especially if they involve any of the things I mentioned above. Even if they don’t though I’d still love to hear them.

I need inspiration folks, so please feel free to share any ideas you might have.