[Life] No Fresh Start, Just Continuing My Journey

‘Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365-page book. Write a good one.’ – Brad Paisley

My social media was filled to the brim yesterday with folks unable to celebrate New Year’s Eve with friends and family but who nevertheless were rejoicing the end of 2020. Which in all honesty happens every year in some way, shape or form. While 2020 has been monumentally shit for more people than most years, there are always folks that are happy to see the year come to end and relish the chance for a fresh start as the New Year begins. 

I do not for one minute condemn those that are glad to see the back of 2020, it has after all been a shitshow of epic proportions. As I sit writing this post though I should be at work, instead I am back on furlough due to being placed in Tier 4 of the Covid-19 restrictions. In terms of Covid 2021 is not off to a great start. As someone residing in the U.K, we also have the implications of no longer being part of the E.U to deal with. These are things we will watch unfurl for much of the year. I hate to say it but I can foresee 2021 will also be a challenge.

This doesn’t really differ from any other year in my opinion though, apart from perhaps the enormity of the challenges ahead. In my head, though I don’t really see January 1st as the start of a new book, hell, most of the time is not even the start of a new chapter. It’s just another day in the story of your life and sometimes it might coincide with a new beginning but more often than not we start writing the story of one year in the days of the year that preceded it. 

For me, many of my 2021 story lines were beginning in 2019, though I perhaps did not know just quite how big my changes were going to be. I started fooling around with Mr F in late 2019, and here we are just over a year later, living together, with a 2021 baby on the way and plans to hopefully find our first proper family home together in 2021. 

I believe that fresh starts can and should happen at any time and I hope that people don’t wait for the New Year in the hopes it will magically bring about the changes they are searching for. My heart does ache for everyone who saw 2021 as the chance to reclaim much of what 2020 took from them though, because as we can all see it seems we do still have a wait ahead of us before plans can be made outside of going to the supermarket or for an approved walk outside.  

I feel privileged that most of my 2021 plans can happen from the comfort of my own home. The only man I want to fuck is in my bed every night. My son is small enough to still live at home and is regularly within cuddling reach. Even staying home and limiting my time outside is in my favour right now, I’m content nurturing my growing belly and resting while I can and I know in many ways my situation makes me incredibly lucky. 

Don’t get me wrong though there are people and adventures I am missing. I didn’t get to visit any of my friends in London in 2020. Even when restrictions would have technically allowed it, work did not. I’ve seen my dad less than a dozen times, which is hard because he’s been facing his own challenges this year and normally we’d hash our thoughts out over lunch or go for a nice walk somewhere with Small Human. I miss these things and very much hope they all return in 2021.

While the fruition of plans may be a while away I do hope we are all still making plans and holding tight to dreams for the future. I don’t think they even need to be big, dramatic plans. After the year we’ve all had even the smallest of outings is likely to feel like an achievement especially when done with people we haven’t seen in the longest of times. 

Then of course there are the 365 days of blank blog pages ahead of us. In 2019 I wrote 354 blog posts, in 2020 I wrote 120 blog posts. I don’t know what 2021 holds for blogging content. I’m going to give January Jumpstart a try, hosted by Violet Fawkes. I highly doubt I’ll blog every day of January, but just upping the tempo would be nice and I’d be happy with that outcome. February, of course, brings us the wonderful February PhotoFest, which I hope to join in with again this year. 

Amongst what I hope are a few predictable joys, there is, of course, all the unknowns that 2021 might bring my way. I hope that both for myself, and the rest of the world that those unknowns aren’t too unpleasant and I certainly hope they include no more pandemics.

3 thoughts on “[Life] No Fresh Start, Just Continuing My Journey

  1. All the best Floss, its been an absolute pleasure to read you over the last few years – may your 2021 be up there with the best of them! Xx

  2. I’ve been back and away and back again so many times over the past year that 2021 really does feel new and fresh to me. I have hope that I’m back, if not for good, at least for awhile. Congrats on the pregnancy and new living situation, btw! Now that’s an exciting thing to look forward to this year. 🙂
    Jade recently posted…A Blank PageMy Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

You Might Like This
Letting go will teach you the art ... ... of…
%d bloggers like this: