Content Warning: Account of knife play and intent to do knife play contained.
When I drew up my list of kinks I could potentially explore for That’s My Kink, knives and knife play were there from the beginning. When I saw Knives was the upcoming prompt for Kink of the Week, I knew the time had come to talk about the sexiness of shiny blades.
For the most part, knives are on my to-do list. It is a kink I haven’t yet explored with Bakji but one that I absolutely want to. As I’ve written my past That’s My Kink post, they’ve often highlighted which kinks I enjoy more as a Top and which I enjoy more as a bottom. When it comes to knife play though I’m torn over which side of slash I want to start with first.
It’s only as a bottom I’ve explored this kink though, so I’ll start there. I’ll outline the scene in a fairly factual manner, then I will address how it felt. I did a scene, probably about 3 years ago now that involved my clothes being cut off me with a knife before I was then suspended in rope. While I was suspended the knife was still in play. There was an element of sexual play involved too, to the point where I was going to climax. Just as I was about to climax the knife was held against my throat and as I was tipping over the edge, the knife was pulled across my throat in a slitting motion. While all that was happening there was also a verbal commentary of what was happening, where the knife was, what it could do to me.
Before I continue I will make it absolutely clear that at no point during the reality of that scene did I ever think I was in danger. I went into that scene with total trust that I would leave it safely and with no harm done to me. That was a correct belief and despite some of the words I am about to use I have fond memories of doing that scene.
This particular scene was one of, if not the most intense scene I’ve ever done as a bottom. There were moments when I was completely terrified, my brain slipping into ‘what if’ mode. I could not see the knife. It was at all times blunt edge down. When you are tied up though, unable to see and all your senses are wonky you cannot feel blunt from sharp, at least I couldn’t. True fear crept in, my heart was racing and even if it was only for a split second I truly wondered what was going to happen to me. At the same time though I was completely and undeniably aroused.
I can only assume that going into that scenario feeling safe, allowed my brain and my body to harness both fear and arousal at the same time. When I finally came during that scene, I came hard, like really fucking hard. As the knife slid across my throat and I wonder if it was sharp side or blunt I orgasmed with such intensity I’m amazed I didn’t pass out.
With that tale told, what is it about knives that made me want to do that scene? There isn’t one answer. Darkness, fear and aesthetics are the main culprits though. Fear play is on my list as a kink in itself, so I’m not going to delve into that too much here. Suffice to say though it’s definitely a hot part of things like knives.
Which leaves us with darkness and aesthetics. Let’s start with the fact knives are pretty and shiny. The look freakin’ sexy and someone sexy holding one while they promise to do wicked things to you just makes me cum in my pants. Things that are deadly but look pretty are fascinating to me. You know how some people love a bad boy. They’re usually dark and brooding, making terrible choices all over the place, bound to hurt everyone they charm yet people all over the world will fall at their feet. Knives are like shiny metal bad boys. You know they’re bad for you but fuuuuck they’re just too sexy to resist.
I’m guessing not everyone feels that way, which perhaps lead us onto being attracted to things that lurk in the darkness. In everyday life, I don’t want bad things to happen to me, or anyone else. I don’t encourage violence or think it’s funny when people get hurt. Knife crime is tragic and abhorrent, I want to make my position on that crystal clear.
Behind closed doors though, when everyone involved is consenting and trust is absolute, I bloody love exploring wicked, dark and twisted things. Sometimes this comes through in my erotica and other times it comes through in kinks I would to or have explored. Knives definitely come under this category. The idea of something so deadly being up close and personal while I’m in a vulnerable position is thrilling.
As a Top, the same things are at play. Would I look super sexy with a knife in my hand? Too damn right I would. Would I look a little bit menacing and potentially unhinged? God, I hope so. Would that fuck with Bakji’s mind and put a little fear into him? I’d be disappointed if that were not the case.
Once again, because I don’t want anyone panicking, I would never cause Bakji any physical harm and anything we do during a scene is always consensual. He consents to a good mindfuck now and again and has confessed to enjoying it when I find ways to make him a little nervous.
As previously stated, in everyday life, I’m a real nice lady. I’m kind, safe to be around and I can hand on heart say I’ve never threatened anyone with a knife and I’ve worked with knives for the 6 years, often in close proximity to the general public. Who as we know are total arseholes. Being able to shed that pleasant nature for a while is so wonderfully freeing. Having the ability to fuck with someone by confessing all the wicked things you want to do them is just so liberating.
Getting to be the bitch is one thing, but getting to be the stuff of nightmares, that’s just another level arousing. It’s arousing because it’s not actually leading me to a life of crime or insanity, instead, it leads to explosive orgasms and intimacy that ripples with delicious and dark intent.
Moving our play in a direction that includes more edge play, which knives absolutely is, is something we’ve been talking about a lot recently. Not because we think it makes us big or clever, or because we think it’s what everyone should be doing. Purely because it interests us both and it compliments our dynamic well, especially the portion of our dynamic that is FemDom led.
I saw Bakji briefly midway through writing this post and the whole time I could not stop thinking about having him fully restrained, as I tease him with the knife in my hand. The hard, unforgiving blade in contrast with his soft, supple flesh. When he said he couldn’t wait for me to Dominate him next, I told him that I couldn’t wait either and I wouldn’t be stopping until he started crying or bleeding. His response was ‘brilliant, now I can’t wait for it even more’.
The truth is he can stop me long before the crying or bleeding commences, his safeword will do that, but body language and subtle hints that he needs a different kind of play would probably work long before he needed a safeword. I know him well enough to know that he’s hoping for the crying and the bleeding to be a reality though and as I said earlier in the post I am a very kind woman, so I am happy to oblige. Let the knife-wielding commence.