[That’s My Kink] Bondage


BDSM, Kink, That's My Kink / Saturday, March 23rd, 2019

Bondage is on the list of kinks I want to discuss for my That’s My Kink series when it came up as the topic for Tell Me About … ran by @5ubmissy and @HisLordship I knew the time had come to talk about what it is I love about bondage.

Bondage As a Bottom

As with many of my kinks my first experience with bondage was as a bottom, specifically a rope bottom. I did this with great passion and enthusiasm for just under a year. When Bakji and I would meet for play sessions he would tie me up and do sexy things to me and I loved it so much that I never imagined that the tables would turn. I also enjoyed it so much I never actually took the time to figure out why I enjoyed it.

Rope & Photo by Bakji

Time has moved on since then, and I know that what I enjoyed about my sessions with Bakji wasn’t the act of being restrained, but the fact he was playing with me and paying me attention. Being his bottom was the arousing factor, what he did, so long as it wasn’t a definitely turn-off was somewhat incidental.

Even with the rope bondage. I spent a lot of time doing quite challenging suspensions, pushing myself further and further, fascinated by what my body could do and that was what I loved about rope bondage. The restraint element was once again a means to an end. I didn’t actively love the feel of being bound and immobilised, I just really enjoy the side effects of being bondage.

At this point, I think it probably sounds like bondage isn’t that much of a kink for me, and you’d be right, as a bottom I am absolutely ambivalent about bondage. I can take it or leave it. I am 100% happy for Bakji to restrain me and a few other trusted friends, but in terms of new partners, I’d say bondage is a soft limit until I have total trust and know exactly why and how bondage is going to be used.

Rope & Photo by Bakji

Bondage Is My Kink

One of the great things about Kink, Fetish and BDSM is that whichever aspect you are looking to explore there are always multiple ways to do so. When I decided to give Rope Topping a try I wasn’t all that convinced I’d be that great at it. Three years down the line, I’m not the best rigger in the world, but I’m alright and I definitely know enough to have Bakji right where I want him.

Rope & Photo by Floss

One of the things that came from my learning rope bondage was a desire to explore other forms of bondage as a Top. Bakji is a massive fan of being restrained, we are talking one of his top kinks and an absolute fetish need, which means restraining him gives me extreme kink highs.

Types of bondage we have tried are rope bondage, as previously mentioned, under bed restraints, leather belts, mummification, with a variety of materials, a vacbed, with hilarious results and nylon bondage straps.

The method of restraint used is more important to Bakji than to me, though I do have a favourite which I will move onto shortly. For me, the kink in bondage as a Top is the actual act of having him restrained. One of my main kinks is power and bondage feeds this desire beautifully. When Bakji is restrained he is all mine. Ownership his not part of our dynamic, but in those moments there is really nothing else in the world for him to be except mine.

He can’t run, he can’t hide. He is stripped bare and powerless to be anything other than what I tell him he is or do anything other what I allow him to do. Which isn’t much, essentially he is allowed to get hard and eventually he’ll be allowed to come, but everything else, talking, moving, even breathing at times is all down to my say so. It is the greatest power trip ever. Which doesn’t just fuel my mental arousal but also my physical arousal.

When Bakji is restrained and I am free to use him and tease him in any way I see fit my whole body feels alive with excitement, the best way to describe it is a feeling of electricity pulsing through my veins, and it builds and builds as we play and when he reaches the final moments and I cause his climax I feel huge rush of energy burst forth from me, almost like a lightning bolt finally reaching the point at which it can be created.

Mummification is Mmmm …

I mentioned that I do indeed have a favourite way to restrain Bakji and that is mummification. We have currently used, clingfilm, palette wrap and vet wrap to aid our adventures in mummification and without a shadow of a doubt vet wrap is my all time favourite. It’s breathable, it’s soft and it’s easy to handle.

What I love about mummification is that it completely immobilises Bakji and it looks incredibly hot. When I mummify him I very often do it from head to toe, so nothing of him can be seen except his penis, which just adds to how frickin’ hot the whole scenario is. Part of the kink here is reducing him to nothing except a dick, no face, no reactions, just a twitching eager dick that wants to be played with.

I also enjoy the fact that it can look a bit ‘odd’ and that can be heightened depending on the colour of the wrap you use, how you bind the body and what other kinks and equipment you incorporate during a mummification scene.

Bondage for Beginners

This could be an entire post within itself, but one of the things I love about bondage is that it can be a great tool for folks who are nervous about starting to Top. One of the tips I am constantly giving on Proud To Be Kinky for folks who are asking how they start their journey as a Top is … tie your bottom up. With their consent of course. Once they’re tied up just play with them, explore them in all the ways you love. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate scene, just the simple act of tying someone up and enjoying their body can be an extremely intimate and kinky experience.

I am a huge fan of under bed restraints, combined with a nice set of cuffs. Minimal setup, easy to remove and not too intimidating. Even now four years into our dynamic and with some more intense bondage skills under our belts I still use our under bed restraints often and to great effect. Bondage needn’t be complicated or scary, it should, however, be a sexy and enjoyable experience for those involved. Which means doing the type of bondage that works for you and not the type that is currently on trend.

Rope & Photo by Floss

Bondage and Bakji Disclaimers

This is not a how-to guide. Just because I’ve mentioned I do things doesn’t mean I think others should do them too. If you are curious about rope bondage and mummification I highly recommend doing your research before embarking on either. They can be high-risk kinks, often referred to as edge play and they can go wrong. We know the risks as a couple and trust each other to play in this way and trust that each partner has the required knowledge to undertake the level of play we engage in.

In my paragraphs about why restraining Bakji turns me on I mention that he has no choice, does as he’s told, can’t escape etc. All this is true, however, it is true because he wants it to be true as much as I do. He always has the option to say no, or safeword. Always. He doesn’t though because he’s a pervert and he loves being at my mercy. That’s his Kink and I love him all the more because of it.

8 Replies to “[That’s My Kink] Bondage”

  1. Bondage has always been a big of kink for me though I don’t get to do it much. I’ve never topped though I’ve tried to start learning how to tie because it is a kink I like so much. Thanks for sharing by the way, it’s nice to read others who like bondage so much

  2. This is a brilliant post Floss and I think that people will find it really helpful. Your pictures are stunning and you do make me want to run and get some rope. You have made me think that perhaps we need to go back and explore a bit further. Thank you 🙂

  3. What a fantastic post. Interesting how you enjoy being the top as well as the bottom. Thank you for sharing

  4. Some fantastic photos and it’s great to hear a various of perpectives on bondage. I may have to do some more research on my rope techniques because yours look rather good.

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